At an undisclosed secure location, SCA Board of Directors members met today in closed-door executive session. Sources close to the Board hinted that one topic of the meeting was the proposed "Iron Peer" event to be held in November in the southernmost tip of the Incipient Barony of Southern Wastes.
One source, who spoke on condition of anonymity, revealed that "they [the Board] are incredibly angry about this event. Those people [presumably, the event staff] showed a totally irresponsible and immature attitude. Did they not even read the SCA's governing documents at all?"
At issue are claims that the event will involve modern-world visitors (the flyer refers to them as "Muggles", a reference to non-magical people in the Harry Potter novels by J.K. Rowling) putting on armor and bashing each other with foam "boffer" weapons similar to those used by children in SCA-sanctioned youth combat. Further, allegations have swirled about this event ever since a disgruntled Marshal started a flame war on an e-mail list, causing other members of the populace to comment stridently and loudly on everything from the dangers of heat exhaustion (from Chivalry fighting all day in sweltering Southern Wastes summer heat with only limited water) to the possibility of alligator and snake attacks upon competitors sent into the wetlands to hunt local waterfowl for feast.
The SCA, Inc., Governing Documents, available at http://sca.org/, define three levels of banishment, but sources claim that the Board is prepared to institute a fourth-level "ultra-mega-mondo-googolplex banishment" specifically for the individuals involved in this event.
At press time, Autocrats for the Iron Peer event still could not be reached for comment, but sources inform SCAtoday.net that the entire event may have even been proposed without the knowledge or approval of the Board, which is normally required to approve every single activity in which the trademarked name SCA™ is used. There is no word from the Board will pursue Legal Action™ against the alleged perpetrators.
Governing Documents™, SCA™, Legal Action™, Board of Directors™, and Ultra-Mega-Mondo-Googolplex Banishment™ are registered trademarks of the SCA, Inc., for its product line of breakfast cereal and children's action figures. Trademark™ is also a registered trademark of the Society for Compulsive Allegations, Inc., for its line of floor wax and adult inflatable action figures.
Time to 'fess up! If you hadn't figured this out already, this story and the event flyer linked from it were April Fool's Day parodies. We hope you enjoyed them, but now that it's almost April 2 in our time zone, it's time to retire the joke. Have a great weekend!